A Mother's Day Idea

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Comment by Melanie Minch on May 15, 2007 at 1:35am

Hi John,
You, your grandfather, sister and friends have all paid dearly in war. I applaud you all.

I'm with you on helping the tragic victims of war.
The "No-more Victims" charity sounds absolutely wonderful. My son's unit has adopted three war-torn, one room school houses in Kosovo. Who knows what domino effects our gifts can have on suffering people. Howe's work "to help improve conditions for soldiers on the battlefield" continues with these charities.

So, without getting into the language of the video of "Disarm" (x3) and that "war be done away with as an acceptable way to deal with conflict," I end with a thank-you for replying so carefully to my comment and a kudo for asking us to step up and help others.

Melanie MInch

Comment by jackforde on May 10, 2007 at 6:47pm

Hi Melanie,

I hope I haven't given you the wrong idea.

I'm the grandson of a WWII-decorated Navy captain. And best friend to a guy who joined at age 32 and has done two tours on a ship in the Persian Gulf during the current conflict, while leaving his wife and two kids behind. What's more, my sister's best friend from childhood was killed in 9/11. And our NYC apartment, which we still had at the time, had Tower-dust choking the filter in the air conditioner.

So, you can bet, I posted this video not unaware of the general pulse of history. War happens. I also know that war is confounding, and not easily judged from where we stand at any moment in time. And it's hell, either way, on both sides of the battle line.

I've got my own opinions about this particular conflict, just like everybody else. But I wasn't airing them here.

As for Howe's opinions, in her original Mother's Day proclamation, she made them not oblivious to evil in the world but very much aware of it, one day after witnessing a bloody Civil War battlefield.

Worth noting that It took two more women, a mother and daughter, to get Mother's Day into popular practice... and both also got behind it to organize mothers to help improve conditions for soldiers on the battlefield.

Even Woodrow Wilson, who finally made the holiday national in 1914, made it a holiday for flying flags for mother's who had lost their sons in battle.

So, the video's point being, it's always been about that. They're asking that we take it back toward that -- mothers, sons, and considering just why it is that combination of fear and pride, as you identify it, mingle so unavoidably together with that unique, maternal spark -- and away from the commercialized, Hallmark-ized thing it's become.

Last year, we ordered my mother a $100 flower bouquet. What arrived was a shriveled handful of flowers that looked like they were picked in a parking lot.

So this year, we tried something different. At the end of this video, the charity they pitch is raising money to bring a 10-year-old Iraqi girl over to the U.S. to get her a pair of prosthetic legs, after her own were blown off by a stray missile. No matter where one stands, is there anything wrong or evil about that? Didn't seem to me that there could be. So we gave, in lieu of a shriveled and temporary flower bouquet, because I know that my mother -- having lived with her half my life ;) -- would appreciate that.

If, by the way, the fact that the 10-year-old girl is Iraqi makes anyone uncomfortable, there are other more local alternatives. Like these, for example:

http://www.soldierride.com/
http://www.justgiving.com/householdcavalry
http://www.fisherhouse.org/

Judging our politicians for what they involve us in is acceptable and should be encouraged. But nobody's trying, in any of these instances or the video, to judge military soldiers, their families, or the complex relationship between war and history in general. They're all just trying, at the individual level, to ameliorate the personal damage.

What could be wrong with that?

Comment by Melanie Minch on May 10, 2007 at 5:06pm

My son is a soldier in Kosovo. His best friend a decorated medic from the Iraq war. My friend had friends killed in 9/11. The world is not kind or safe. To think "we can all just get along" didn't work in kindergarten and it won't work in a world where evil sneaks up behind you and blows you to smitherins. I'm a Mother of a soldier who is scared to death but also very proud. Yes, war is hell. But this side of heaven, murder has been a reality since Cain and Abel. We can't wish it away.
Melanie Minch